Saturday, March 7, 2015

An Open Letter to the Teenager at the Rodeo

Dear Teenage Girl,

I thought about you the whole way home,  and I just can't NOT say anything.   You were leaving Reliant Center with your mom at about 10:30 tonight (3/7/15).  I heard you say to your mom,  "That's fine.   We'll do everything you want to do but nothing I want...Let's just get the fuck out of here, " and then you stormed out the door.

ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR EVER-LOVING MIND?  I mean seriously!  Have you lost it?

I wished the whole way home that I had said something to you,  and I regret that I did not.   In an effort to not lose sleep over your terrible ass, I will respond here,  and I pray this makes its way to your news feed for your own good and for your mom.

Newsflash:  She's been doing what you want to do since you were in her womb.  She probably doesn't even have that many friends because she's been so busy doing what makes you happy that she's foregone her own happiness and friendships. 

I hope I'm wrong,  but I doubt it.  

You may not know this,  but today,  your mom woke up,  got dressed, and smiled in the mirror because she was going to spend the day with you.   Sure,  she dreaded it a little because you are a teenager,  but mostly,  she was full of love and excitement.   After all,  her days with you are fewer and further between.   I'm guessing she even bought your outfit and paid for your tickets so that the day would be perfect. .. for YOU. 

I won't launch into a long speech about how she pays for everything so you should respect her... but she does... and you should.

At the moment you let your rotteness overcome your words and actions, you broke her heart.   You crushed your mother's spirit.   You dashed her dream of a great day with her stunningly beautiful daughter.   You know,  she thought you were stunning the first moment she saw you even though you weren't.   You were an ugly newborn like the rest of us.  

I'm willing to bet that somewhere on your iPhone or Facebook page or Instagram account or Twitter feed,  there exists a photo of you with duck lips, a peace sign, and a #omg #nobullies #cantwealljustgetalong #lookhowcuteiamwithducklips caption.   But you JUST bullied the one person who loves you more than life.   #shebroughtyouintothisworldshecantakeyououtofit #butshewont. Because she loves you.   And it's illegal. 

My wish is that your ass (you know,  then one she wiped before you could wipe it yourself?) is solidly grounded until you're 28.  (I really wish I'd seen her hit you with her purse or stomp on your iPhone, but she didn't look like a mean mom like me).   But even if you're not grounded,  I hope you know these two things:

1.  Your mom most likely cried when she got home and no one was around.

2. You are going to have a little girl that you think is stunning even though she's not because she will be an ugly newborn like the rest of us,  and she is going to consume your life.   She'll growup in that moment you blinked.  Then, one day,  you'll wake up,  get dressed,  and smile in your mirror because you get to spend the day with her.   After all, your days with her will be fewer and further between.  You'll buy her a new outfit, pay for her tickets, and at the end of the night,  she'll break your heart.  She'll crush your spirit.   She'll dash your dream of an exciting day with your stunning daughter.

I hope I'm wrong,  but I doubt it.     


1 comment:

  1. Great article/rant! I am so sorry you lost sleep over her - but I certainly hope today and all other days will be better. You're a great mother, and if or when your daughters ever talk back to you, I'll be right there to tell them "HEEEEEEEEEEEEY NO!". <3